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Friday, July 27, 2012

On CFA, Homosexuality & Gay Marriage

The big uproar in the news this week revolves around the owner of Chick-Fil-A's (CFA) personal stance on the issue of gay marriage.  Before getting into my thoughts on this subject, let me just say I kind of feel bad for the guy.  It's not like he had a press conference to come out and made a public statement or even that he had some agenda to make CFA the national target for conservatism on this issue.  Simply put he was asked if he stood in the camp assumed and he did not deny the truth.  Agree with him or not, the intention was not malicious or hateful.  In an age where so few people are willing to be honest and take responsibility, I can appreciate that.

It's no secret that I am a Christian, financially conservative & politically bent to the right.  This would leave many to assume that I am homophobic, intolerant, hateful, etc.  However, in all honesty, the topic of homosexuality just leaves me with lots of questions, lots of frustration & lots of sadness.  I have no fear, hatred or negative feelings toward homosexuals.  In fact, some of my very favorite people in the whole world are gay and given the opportunity, there are many gay people I would rather spend my time with than people who call themselves 'Christians.'

I believe in Jesus and I choose the world view that His plan is the best plan for each of us.  I personally see Him at work each and every day and I can not deny that He exists.  When I look at Scripture, I believe it calls homosexuality a sin.  Could I be wrong? Of course.  And are you free to believe what you would like to believe? Absolutely.  Does that make us enemies? No. 

I am also a huge believer of personal responsibility. God calls His people to obey His word, and to tell the world about Him; not to condemn and throw stones. So, when it comes to the issue of homosexuality, I choose to simply love. I am not perfect and while I hate it, I find my humanity choosing sin every day. I am repentant & in need of grace each minute of every day. I believe that there will be consequences for my transgressions and any consequences of others sin is between them & God.

What is most frustrating for me is that this is usually where the conversation stops.  And for every homosexual that I have been able to discuss with, it is not enough. It's not enough to be unsure, it's not enough to love but think there is a better way. It is heartbreaking! It's as if anything less than 100% agreement and commitment to the cause is unacceptable. When I long for the opportunity to continue to share & grow, the supposedly highly 'tollerant' group of the bunch has left the building. When I want to share in life & to show the love of Jesus...it's simply not enough.

The biggest problem in this opposition, I believe, lies in the driving force of ones life.  When I make decisions, I try my best to lean my heart & my choices toward the word of God.  It's not always easy & it is definitely not always how I want it to go, but I choose to trust that God has a plan.  Through hindsight, I have seen God do crazy beautiful things through situations I would have changed in a heartbeat had this been my world; but it's not. 


Most of America is driven on emotions & feelings.  If you want it, buy it (worry about how you'll pay for it later).  If it tastes good, eat it (any wonder we're obese?).  If it feels good, do it.  We believe that if it satisfies us & doesn't really hurt others, it must be right.  Not necessarily...


In Dave Ramsey's Financial Peace course he does an illustration at the beginning where he asks everyone in the room to close their eyes and point north.  Once he tells them to open their eyes, every finger is pointed in a different direction.  He uses the illustration to point out that feelings & truth are not the same and that until we can line our feeling up with the truth, we'll never be headed in the direction we should be.  While this illustration is great, the problem exists when there is no common compass.  If everyone were following the same lead, the same guidebook, the same common denominator it would be a much easier discussion to have.   However, because of the wonderful gift of freedom, we are not.  And there in lies the problem.


As for the topic gay marriage...I stand torn.  While I don't think that is what God intended marriage to be, neither are probably 90% of today's marriages.  I don't believe it falls within the religious institution or marriage, but that is very different than the governmental institution of marriage.  I would actually like to see less government in all marriage.  Maybe instead of fighting to redefine, what if we just allowed various forms of partnership in relation to government/family rights & tax incentives?

I like to think that any length of time with real Christ followers, would show more people torn, frustrated and ready to love regardless of choice or place in life.

11 comments:

  1. You're absolutely right about it not being Cathy's intention. He was asked a question, probably pressed quite a bit for the answer that the interviewer wanted to hear. And I completely agree with Jen Hatmaker as well, that God forbid a man give his opinion. Had a business owner said they supported gay marriage, I'm sure he would be rallied around as a modern hero of sorts instead of being lambasted like Cathy, who I too feel sorry for.

    What I'm sickened by is how divided everything feels now, in a kind of "If you're not with me, you're against me," manner coming from both sides. The attitude of some of those thatfall furthest to the left are just as hateful as they CLAIM the attitudes of those on the right are. Both are turning into big bullies, and neither are being very good representatives of God's love.

    I chatted with a gay friend about this the other night, and he had a very nonchalant attitude about the whole thing. If people are going to CFA specifically because they support anti-gay organizations, that's one thing. But he said "If you go there because it's tasty?...guilty." Live and let live as long as no one is pressuring him with their beliefs. As his desires for marriage, he claims atheism, so he's not concerned with his marriage being deemed holy matrimony or not.

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    Replies
    1. I agree that the divide is bad! When I think of other differences (religious for example), there is not this kind of divide. I think if it weren't for redefining a 'Christian' value there wouldn't be such an uproar. The problem is that we are a nation built on those Christian values an in this issue they have been intertwined. As a Christian, it kind of feels like your asking those who celebrate Hanukkah to all openly welcome & adore a Christmas tree. If we're talking government & social rights it's completely different. I really think if they went about it from a different angle they could more easily get what they want (if I am correct in my understanding of what they really want).

      The whole CFA thing has just gotten out of control! We don't eat there regularly & I won't be eating there any more or less after this. And good to see your friend has a level head about the whole thing. It has been blown way out of proportion on both sides! Feel free to pass this along to him...I would love more dialog on this topic :)

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